Ways to Get Your Dating Life Back on Track

"Personal Guide For Women"If your dating life has hit a slump, you may need to do an emotional re-set to get it going again. Every dater goes through a slump at some point in their dating life. To get things back on track, you have to make a few changes. First, the tactics you’re using to meet new people. Second? Your attitude. It can be difficult when you’ve been single a long time and just want to meet someone, but don’t give up! Try these tips instead.

Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

The first step in a change of attitude is simply to look at your life as the individual and unique thing it is without comparing yourself to anyone else. This can be difficult, especially when other people around you are married, having babies, or getting engaged. No matter what is going on around you, realize that every single person is on a different path to finding love.

Learn the Joy of Dating Casually

Some daters think the term “casual dating” means having sex with numerous people. But that’s incorrect. Dating casually simply means you go out with a variety of people without having sex. The dates are platonic, and allow you to truly get to know the people you’re with. Casual dating is fun because the pressure of whether or not you’re going to “do it” is removed.

Each time you get together, you and your date talk, hold hands, and do fun things together. You get to know your date on a deeper level this way, and when it does come time to bring your relationship to the next step, it is a much more fulfilling experience. If this sounds old-fashioned to you, consider the times you’ve jumped into the sack with someone quickly. Did it last? Was it a good relationship?

Casual dating also means you are going out on coffee dates with a variety of people. The more people you meet, the better chance you’ll have of connecting with someone. There are many ways to meet new singles, so give a few methods a try and see what works best for you.

Set Realistic Expectations

Having goals that relate to your dating life is fine, but make sure they are realistic. For example, rather than saying you’re going to get married this year, aim to meet at least one new person a week instead. Ask friends to set you up, go online, or try out lunch dating. Make the goal meeting new people rather than starting a relationship. If you just resolve to have coffee with one new person each week, you will eventually meet someone who is right for you.

All of these tips take time. A better dating life is built little by little, with small changes that add up significantly. You might not be able to meet someone new today, but with these tips you can be on your way, and that’s the most important thing.

6 Tips to Survive Long Separation in Marriage

Today’s society finds mobility of family life a blessing to the intellect. It has obviously helped to broaden people’s minds. But what does the mobile society do about a person’s emotional life?

Many people are on the move together — father gets a job away from home and takes his family over to his place of work. But for a vast majority of couples, mobility means leaving wife and children behind as the husband tries to cope with life single-handed. Airline pilots, sailors, salesmen, journalists, news photographers, soldiers know what it is to be separated from their families and if medals were awarded them for good service, they know that their wives deserve them too.

Departures and arrivals are always exciting but the lonely waiting in between cap put a strain on marriage. It can be agony for the wife who not only has to deal with loneliness but worry about her husband and discharge parental duties alone. So what does a woman do to occupy herself while her husband is away? How does she manage to continue feeling as intensely about him as she did before?

Short separation is seldom a problem and can even be a refreshing experience. The first time the husband is away on business for a few days, his wife and children realize the extent of the gap he leaves and feel how much they miss him. Some couples find being separated, even for a short time, intolerable. Newly married couples feel it, unless separation starts early and become a constant feature in the marriage. If a wife is too dependent emotionally on her husband, separation can lead to such a state of insecurity for the dependent partner that either her nerves or the marriage breaks down.

For the survival of any marriage that involves long separation, it becomes essential to:

1) Sort out the right balance of dependence and independence. When they’re together, each partner should be dependent on the other to keep the marriage from turning into an emotional vacuum. But when they’re apart they must be capable of an independent life. It may take years of experience to get the right balance but patience helps.

2) If the wife is merely keeping the home fires burning, her personality is in danger of disentegrating, and she may center her life around her children while her husband is away. But too much of it has its dangers for the wife and the children.

3) The safest course is for the woman to find some interest, work, or leisure, that will absorb her mind sufficiently for her to think of it as an achievement of her own. For some wives, a full-time career may be necessary.

4) Communication is of vital importance. Letters and phone calls provide continuing contact and prevent a couple from drifting apart during a lengthy separation. They must keep in touch with each other’s thoughts and activities to prevent resentment from over taking place.

5) The question of fidelity during long absences may be solved by a tactful acceptance that the partner’s own conscience can be trusted. Maintaining a not too rigid concern about the other’s activities based on the assumption that he is trying to cope with the difficulties of a lonely life, also helps.

6) Talking to other wives of absentee husbands will help ease the loneliness and keep the wife’s personality as alive as her husband’s when she welcomes him home.

Separation is a severe test of marriage but if the couple is able, to cope with it, the rewards are high. Although good-byes can be painful, hellos can make a couple feel like newlyweds again.

Incoming search terms for the article:

How to Give Your Boyfriend Space

It’s a bit of a running joke sometimes, about the man in your life needing more “space”, but in reality, it’s no joke at all. Any relationship in which two people behave in an overly dependent manner can feel oppressive or smothering for either party, and indicates a need for one or both people to learn to cope apart as well as together.

A healthy relationship will always benefit from giving each other space, and never more so than when you feel that your boyfriend is champing at the bit to be “released” a little more often to just be by himself or to spend time with his mates. If you’re finding it challenging to let go even though the relationship’s becoming a bit too much to handle, it’s a sign that now more than ever, you do need to learn to give him his space. Here are some suggestions to help you. Give him space enough to miss you but never leave it long enough for him too forget and stop needing you !

STEPS

Reach a decision that it’s alright to give your boyfriend space. The sooner you accept that giving one another space is normal, healthy, and indeed necessary for a flourishing relationship, the better for the both of you. If things have been reaching breakpoint in your relationship, try letting the situation go for a while. Stop wanting to control what he’s doing, and stop worrying and being frustrated about what you’re not getting out of the relationship. Instead, just relax in the present moment. By letting things be, they often have a way of fixing themselves on their own.

  • Realize that your boyfriend is more likely to want to break up with you if you keep breathing down his neck than if you give him the space he craves.
  • Don’t assume the worst when he asks for space;
  • Trust

Ask questions to clarify what’s going on. Without appearing paranoid or overly emotional, be forthright in asking your boyfriend what he sees as being given space, and how much time he’s contemplating. Is he wanting a few days or weeks now, or does he want this to be a permanent arrangement, such as having every Saturday to himself? This can help to reassure you that he has sound reasons for wanting space that don’t involve breaking up with you, and it gives both of you some solid ground to work out the duration or precise times you won’t be turning up in his life.

Sort something out amicably. At this stage, it’s vital that you don’t come across as needy, petulant, or terrified of losing him. Whatever you do, do not walk off in a huff or throw a fit. Both reactions are calculated to have him retreat even further into his shell and feel justified for wanting even more space! Instead, visualize yourself as a person negotiating something that is perfectly reasonable, then go ahead and negotiate it without appearing too down.

  • Don’t look like you need him.
  • Avoid begging for anything.

Shape up your own time. Instead of feeling mopey and clingy, see this as a great opportunity to occupy yourself with a range of things to do and friends to meet up with. Rediscover or uncover a hobby, new or old friends, and activities. Become more involved in your career direction and perhaps think about improving your chances of getting a promotion. Get some purpose back into your life that allows you to grow and exist apart from your boyfriend, and to be able to prove to him that you’re capable on your own, which will reassure him more than anything else that you’re not going to suffocate him.

  • Get outdoors and do some fun activities.
  • If you feel as if you’ve lost yourself when he asks for space, this is a good indication that you need the space as much as he does.
  • Realize and embrace the power of showing that you have a life of your own.

Be patient. If you both want the relationship to succeed at a gradual pace, then love the space for the chances it provides you both. Take time to discover each other and yourselves rather than always trying to please one another or set one another off when things don’t fall into place as you’d like. When you allow your boyfriend the space to think, to do the things he loves, and to be with his mates, he’ll start missing you soon enough and wanting you by his side again.

Respect his choices and his freedom. The more respect and freedom you give your boyfriend, the more he’ll come to you, because you’ll be someone who doesn’t make demands on him. Nobody likes demands, and guys are especially uncomfortable when they feel the pressure of romantic demands. Such pressure can push them away from people pushing the demands on them. On the other hand, if a guy can spend time with someone who loves him for who he is, and just lets him be himself with no conditions or demands placed on him, he’ll absolutely love you. Love unconditionally, which simply means: set no conditions.

Be his best friend. Listen when he talks and don’t comment until he’s done talking. When you do comment, be positive and supportive. Don’t criticize or judge – if you feel you need to do that, think very carefully about why you want to be with him.

Change your own bad habits. If you have any bad habits you know he doesn’t like (like whining, clinging, gossiping, etc.), seek to change them. And prove to him you are changed. He may test you, so give him time – his new trust won’t come fast, so you need to be patient and consistent. Always remember, people do change once they make up their mind to do so, which means so can you.

Don’t give your boyfriend space as a ruse just to manipulate him and then try to seek to control him again. Do it because you want to change the way you approach your relationship together and because you love him and trust that this is the right thing for your relationship at this point. When you approach the space issue with the right mindset of broadening your own life experiences and respecting his time to do the same, you’ll be more confident and independent no matter what the final outcome.

Relax and be the girl he fell in love with. Be happy and carefree, learn to love yourself as much as you love him, and find constructive ways to share time together and apart. Once you’ve got the balance sorted, you’ll never look back.

Incoming search terms for the article: